Here is a fact that is very frustrating: men are not "supposed" to suffer with pain. They are "supposed" to suck it up and tough it out and go do whatever even if they are ready to drop because of agony. That makes me crazy. I can tell you times when we weren't able to go to some function and someone said something to the effect that TB should just tough it out.
And fibromyalgia? Hey, that's "a woman's thing". Guess what. No it isn't! There are websites out there with information about men and fibromyalgia like this one.
Men are raised to believe that men don’t cry. They are told to "shake it off" and to "take it like a man." Men fix things, men are the hunters, men are supposed to be the breadwinners, the head of the household. Men are inundated with these concepts from a very early age. Showing pain is showing weakness to so many men. Fibromyalgia does not shake off. Fibromyalgia does not give up. It does not stop for anyone, or anything.
Even TB's doctor, the one who increased the level of his really scary-heavy-duty-narcotic pain medication scoffs. He agreed to check the trigger points from head to waist. Although TB was sensitive in all those places, the doctor thinks TB's got neuropathy or that all this pain is from "the loss of all that weight". Right. The pain in his neck and skull is from weight loss. Suuuuuuuure.
Like me, TB's also experiencing this scary thing called fibrofog. I think of it as like having cotton-candy-in-the-brain. It doesn't happen all the time but when it does, it's really debilitating! Now, have this happen to a man who's already saddled with all these expectations about what a guy is supposed to think and feel and it's even more debilitating because now they're beating themselves up because it's happening. Grrrrr!
That's okay. We're going to a chronic pain management specialist, one who deals with fibromyalgia and one who can advise us the best way to manage all that pain.
And everyone else? We're doing the best we can. We're not pushing past the point of endurance and no more sucking it up either.