More thoughts on mainstreaming

I had some time to think some more about mainstreaming while I was waiting for Kristin to finish her ASL class. I see many benefits for most children but I'm not a big fan of mainstreaming for Deaf children. The view is that all children should be educated with their peers in the "least restrictive environment". I just am not sure this is the least restrictive environment for Deaf children.

Why?

Most Deaf kids start out at a disadvantage. They have hearing parents that don't realize at first anything is going on with their child's hearing. These children miss out on a lot of language development. Deaf parents of Deaf children and even hearing children start out signing from the get-go. The language development is there. When the hearing parents realize something is "wrong" they go to a medical professional. These professionals view deafness as a problem that needs to be fixed. In years gone by, they'd recommend lip reading to the parents, not sign language. Nowadays it's the cochlear implant. Sign language is usually not encouraged and hearing parents are not introduced to Deaf adults.

Deaf kids used to go to state schools for the Deaf almost exclusively. That's where they learned language and sort of "caught up" where they lagged. The children learned their language and culture not so much from teachers as from peers with Deaf parents. Deaf culture is a whole other big topic I could get into another time. The biggest complaint about Deaf schools, I guess, is that the education isn't comparable to hearing schools.

Okay, so now deaf children are mainstreamed into hearing schools. Some schools have a Deaf program so at some point during the day, the child at least gets to interact with other deaf kids. Many times, though, the child is mainstreamed into a school with no other Deaf students. There's a teacher of the Deaf and an interpreter, that's it. The child usually becomes attached or dependent on one or both of the adults. The adults are the ones who teach the child sign language (if the parents will allow it) and fill in so many of the gaps the child has with everything that goes on.

This has been my experience interpreting for Deaf children in a mainstream environment over the years: it's isolating and frustrating and lonely for the kids, especially when they start out in school not knowing any sign language. That puts them at a big disadvantage because they miss so much. The best lip reader gets 30% and guesses the rest. It's exhausting to watch lips moving for hours at a time. Having a cochlear implant doesn't mean the child can hear and understand everything. Teachers and interpreters have to re-teach a lot!

Deaf kids are cut off from their hearing peers due to communication barriers. Hearing kids often don't want to repeat or explain things so deaf kids are left out. There are a few kids that are interested enough to sign and explain but there's not many. In Deaf school, the environment is different because everyone signs. Some hearing kids avoided the deaf kids as if they were afraid they were going to catch "it".

Then of course, any difference can make a kid a target for bullies and teasing. That kind of stuff happens everywhere, it's true. Still, my feeling is why put a target on a kid's back?

I believe that mainstreaming Deaf children puts them in the most restrictive environment. More than once I've shared my view with the parents of students I interpreted for. The kids were miserable and not performing well. I would tell the parents privately that I thought their children would do better in a school for the Deaf--even if it meant my job would go away. A few years later, I met several of the kids who transferred to Deaf schools from hearing schools and was gratified to see how they'd flourished.

My view would be much less popular now because of the cochlear implant--implanting children is an issue that makes me froth at the mouth and is another topic I could rant on later. Hearing parents think the implant is a miracle operation; that it restores their child's hearing and ability to understand. It doesn't. There are times when the implant has to be turned off or come out and then the child is as deaf as ever. Parents are less likely to learn to sign when the child is implanted. That's unfortunate because it leaves the child at a disadvantage at home and at school.

On the up side, I did meet a teenager who was implanted successfully you could say. She came to my Deaf Culture class and spoke to us. Her speech was very clear. When it came to Q&A, though, I noticed our instructor became an interpreter for the teenager. She was unable to understand questions from the audience but at least was able to fall back on sign language. She was about to go into her senior year and was presently at a school with a Deaf program. However, the district wanted to disband that and send everyone to their home schools. The student would be alone, without Deaf peers. She and her parents were fighting the district about that. I don't know what happened.

As for Little T, because he's hearing, I think mainstreaming would benefit him at some point. Right now, there is a program at his school for kids on the autistic spectrum so he would still see his friends from those classes. Next year, T will be in third grade and will move to a new school. I'm thinking that's the ideal time to start mainstreaming him for more classes. New school, new routine to get used to. I hope that's the way it goes.

To mainstream or not?

Our grandson is now in second grade! He's a very bright little boy; we've known that for years. One of his gifts is that he remembers how to get places after only being there one time. He also enjoys writing and spelling. He's been practicing letters since I can remember. A couple of years ago, I kept pads of paper on hand so he could write out words. He enjoys reading and being read to.

The issue of mainstreaming him for classes came up in a recent parent-teacher conference and his dad is understandably concerned. Little T is a very bright boy but he's also a sensitive little guy. Kennan was telling us that he's come home crying on the bus because his teacher gave him a hard time about having dirty fingernails. I think the teacher handled the situation very badly. If there was a problem, she should have written a note to Kennan.

Anyway, T is diagnosed with PDD-NOS. He likes a routine and is not happy when it's disrupted. A change can cause him to shut down. That's one of Kennan's concerns. We're half way through the school year and this would be a major change for T. Kennan's thinking it might be better to just wait until the next school year.

The next concern is that T also has apraxia of speech. When he's excited, it's hard to understand him at all. I understand Kennan's worry that other kids would make fun of him for his differences. I worry about that too. Kids can be so cruel!

I remember when I was an interpreter in two school districts. Many times I was the buffer between mean kids and my Deaf students. A couple of times in the hallways, I had to reprimand these mean kids. They mostly made fun of the Deaf kids because of their speech. I wasn't there on the playground or lunch room so I wasn't able to intervene at those times. I knew the Deaf students were very isolated and it was sad. They clung to me out of loneliness. T wouldn't even have that. He'd be alone in the classroom and I don't like to think about it.

What to do though? My view is that the teacher should be providing material to challenge him. Instead, he's bored. The law says he should be educated with his peers. The law does not see what happens to disabled kids in classrooms though. There's no heart, blood and feeling in the law.

My own opinion in this is to gradually introduce T to mainstreaming. He's already mainstreamed for art and music. I think he could try part of a language class--spelling, for instance. Or reading. He could go in to be read to or write a story. I'm not sure what his math skills are. As he gains success, he can get mainstreamed more.

Kennan seems to be leaning toward waiting until next year and I think that's okay. He's willing to let Little T try science, possibly this year. Kennan's talking with us about it and exploring his feelings about mainstreaming because he's worried and wants what's best for Little T. He's a good dad!

My how time flies!

TB had athroscopic shoulder surgery Tuesday morning and I haven't been online much since then. He's doing really well! The surgeon told me that they did quite a bit of repairs: there was a large tear and two smaller ones in or around his rotator cuff; removed bone spurs and free floating "matter" (ew, what was it? broken off pieces of arthritic bone spur?); and snipped part of his biceps. He came home looking like he was wearing half of a football player's gear! You can see a picture of TB and read his post here. He describes the gear really well! I am really happy this time around because he's in a lot less pain than he was after the first time he had shoulder surgery (on the other side). It bothers him but not nearly so much. He is still having pain in his back and neck so we have a ways to go before he's feeling a whole lot better.

Heidi moved back in on Wednesday. She wasn't happy living at Marianne's house. I kind of had a feeling that would happen. When I went to help drive back some of her stuff, Mari's mother came out to talk to me--like I didn't know my own daughter! She warned me to stay on top of Heidi about taking her "happy" pills. Ha! She also said Heidi wasn't getting along because she would get so angry and scream. I said, I told you about that. Duh. Then she tells me that Heidi hasn't saved any money for college and that she probably won't be able to afford to go because she'd get turned down for financial aid because of her poor grades the last semester she'd gone. Apparently she didn't know that Heidi filed an appeal to be reconsidered because of her circumstances at the time. :P She told me I had to stay on top of her to make sure she calls to follow up! Please!

That night, Kristin was up all night--not because she was yakking or anything but because she couldn't sleep. The next day, she was having mood swings, rapid cycling between being high and low. That was a little scary.

I totally missed cats in boxes day for Feline Friday. Oh well...

We had Little T with us on Friday and that was a lot of fun! Here are some pictures of my two building engineers:


T and TB played with Lincoln logs in the afternoon when it grew too hot and we became too tired to go walking again


The Little T sideways look


TB the Builder


Surprise!


Tickle Tickle!

I'm really relieved that things went so well. We'd picked him up Monday afternoon and had to tote him around on some errands. He was terrific on the trips to the doctors' offices but then had a meltdown at the library that was pretty awful. :( It's a long story but we finally had to call Kennan to come get him because he'd planted his little heinie in front of the library sliding doors and we couldn't budge him! Reasoning didn't work, bribery didn't work, a swat on the butt didn't work and neither of us were strong enough to pick him up and carry him. We're concerned about being able to keep him safe as he gets bigger and stronger--it isn't all the time, but he's definitely got some oppositional defiant issues going on. :(

And...I weighed myself and found I'd lost another 2-1/2 lbs. Yay, me!

Little Mr. Poopyhead

Yesterday we saw Little T again for his weekly scheduled visit with his mother. Before she arrived, he was getting a kick out of playing hide'n'seek with his Uncle Bill. After about 20 minutes of this, though, Bill had to leave for work.

Once Linda arrived, TB asked if they'd like to go for a walk in the woods. There are lots of cleared paths and TB's been walking there a lot, snapping pictures of wildlife and the lake from a more rustic point of view.

Little T was very enthusiastic about going until he realized he wasn't familiar with the route. He got very upset and wanted to go back into the house. TB and Linda were cool with it, assuring him he could go "his" way if he wanted. T went upstairs and laid down on the floor outside Billy's room. He didn't mind me taking these pictures though.







It took a long time for his mother to persuade him to come on down and pick an activity he wanted to do. He couldn't seem to make up his mind. Oh well...I guess it was just one of those poopyhead days we all get from time to time!

Autism: why more boys than girls?/SAT Rant

A Genetic Clue to Why Autism Affects Boys More
By ALICE PARK Alice Park Wed May 20, 6:20 am ET

Among the many mysteries that befuddle autism researchers: why the disorder affects boys four times more often than girls. But in new findings reported online today by the journal Molecular Psychiatry, researchers say they have found a genetic clue that may help explain the disparity.

The rest of the article can be found here.

And now for something completely different: why I'm so darned mad with the SAT College Board in Princeton, NJ.

You can't get into college from high school without taking the SAT. Yes, I know there is the ACT but most--if not all--schools look for the SAT score. So as far as I'm concerned, they hold a monopoly...and there is NO accountability!

Here's what happened to my daughter last year: she somehow ended up with my last name on the registration. The kids all still carry their dad's last name while I have TB's. So...since the wrong name was on the ticket, she was turned away. The SAT Board wouldn't change the information without documentation.

No problem. I sent in the birth certificate, social security card and--since Kristin doesn't have a passport or a driver's license--a letter from her school counselor stating she is Kristin (her dad's last name). The SAT College Board never changed the information--nor did they tell me that the letter wasn't enough.

When we tried to register her again, I called and first they told me the birth certificate wasn't valid. I was upset about that because the state seal is definitely there! I got a supervisor on the phone that finally said they needed a valid *photo* ID. Why had no one bothered to tell me? We had to print a form from the website, attach a picture, have the counselor sign *that* and then affix the school seal.

I faxed all the information...AGAIN...on May 6. When I called to find out why it still wasn't changed, they claimed they never got the fax. They've made that claim before with the original faxing. I think I must have faxed stuff to them a half dozen times before they admitted getting it...and I don't have a fax machine. I went to a UPS store and paid for these things. I have receipts. Receipts aren't worth anything to the SAT.

Now they said I could email them the information so TB did. I called back about an hour later and first they said they never received it. Then when I demanded a supervisor again,oh, whoops, they did receive it but not from an *authorized* email account--the one appearing on the registration. Damn them! All they had to do was SAY it had to come from the email on the registration and that Kristin's name/case number appearing in the subject line would NOT be enough.

So we got Kristin to send the information from her account. Now they say yes, they did get it and that they would change the last name...but it won't appear online until Friday. Friday is the cut-off day for registration and I could just *SCREAM!* These people are worse than the NJ DMV and there is absolutely nothing we can do. They hold our kids hostage!

Wordless Wednesday: Enter Stage Right (I Think)

Wordless Wednesday

What a nightmare

Some days watching Little T goes very smoothly for us and some days are difficult. Today was just awful and I'm in tears. Linda was supposed to have visitation with the little guy from 4-7 but she never called and never showed up. The other night a Manchester County detective was looking for her, to ask her some questions. Hmmm.

I don't think Little T knew his mother was supposed to come. She is so unreliable that I don't tell him anything until she's there. When we got in the door from picking him up at school, he wanted to play in the family room with the dog. Well, the dog goes bonkers and gets out of control so we usually go outside for that except it was way too cold today and Little T was just over a virus. The dog got to barking and acting wild so we put him out in the yard and that's when the trouble started.

T kept trying to open the door to let the dog back in. We said no and when he got it that we weren't kidding, he threw himself on the ground and began kicking--the door, the floor and anyone who got in the way.

Little T does have some pervasive behavior issues--they occur everywhere and with everyone so I know we weren't singled out. There are times when he just won't give in and listen. He wants what he wants and he wants it NOW and nothing will deter him. While he had this particular tantrum we just moved him away from the door and everyone got clear of him and we waited for him to calm down and start playing happily with his toys as he usually does but he wouldn't.

He got up and began messing with the entertainment center's glass doors, swinging them back and forth or kicking at them. I told him to stop or he'd have to sit on the naughty step and he just ignored me. If I'd been alone, I would have been screwed because he is too strong for me to handle. As it was, Kristin had to wrap her arms around him to keep him from getting back to the entertainment center and trying to break it. He was flailing out with his arms and legs and could have hurt someone or himself.

After four minutes, he'd calmed down so I went to him and said, we put you on the naughty step because you wouldn't listen. I need you to say you're sorry. And he said, NO. And tried to go right back to the entertainment center.

I'm too old for this. I called Kennan, explained what happened and that Linda never showed up. He said he was sick and was sending his mother to get T. So for the next 40 minutes, we had more of the same and I was exhausted and near tears. Then all of a sudden, the sun came out, he was sorry and went into the living room to play with his V-tech and game.

About 5 minutes later, Kennan's mom showed up. We commiserated another few minutes about the difficulties both of us were having as well as T's aunt, his teacher, and even his father. The teacher mentioned calling in a behaviorist for a consult and I mentioned to Vicky that this would be a good idea because T is getting bigger and stronger every day.

Now it was time for T to go home and at first I thought he was going to pitch another fit but he got his coat and hat on willingly and I thought the storm was over. Then he signed 'milk' and ran into the kitchen. Looking back, I should have just given him a cup to take in the car. That's not the way we went, though. Vicky said she'd give him milk at home and I said I would give him milk tomorrow. He stood with his foot blocking the fridge door from closing and wouldn't budge.

The whole thing started all over again. He collapsed to the floor, wouldn't get up, wouldn't have anything to do with leaving. Vicky called Kennan on the phone and he talked sternly to T to no avail. Then we decided that Bill would just have to pick T up and carry him to the truck. At that point, T decided to take the dignified way out and walk on his own two feet.

I am so drained. I'm aware that behavior issues like these can be co-morbid with PDD-NOS but I really don't know how to handle it at this point. I don't want to put Kennan in a tough spot by saying I can't watch T every day anymore but I need strategies and I just don't know what to do. :(

Earlier in the afternoon I had my appointment with the pulmonologist to clear me for surgery. TB came along with me. I really liked this guy. He was very thorough and ordered a stress test for me. I have to go back later in January for the test and it's two parts because of my weight. :P I tell you, that will be a piece of cake compared to today. I bet they'd have gotten a better read of my heart under stress today!

I still haven't decided which surgery yet to choose. More on my confusion another time.

Friday Sundries

Today, not only did Cubby and Sox allow me to take their picture, they actually looked at the camera! Jean and Matthew will enjoy this one. :)

Want more cat blogging? Check out Finally Friday and for all the latest, Blogging Cat Noos!

Today, TB and I took Little T for speech therapy again. We are in such awe of what the therapist can do with the little guy. He can make all of his vowel sounds with no problem and so the next step is working on the consonants. The therapist told me that he can put his tongue in place to make the "t" or "d" sound but apparently hasn't connected the concept of blowing air and making the sound at the same time. He'll get there, he's come so far!

Friday's Feast #196



Appetizer

When was the last time you had your hair cut/trimmed?
Last month and it needs to be trimmed
Soup

Name one thing you miss about being a child. Spending quality time with my grandma

Salad

Pick one: butter, margarine, olive oil. Olive oil

Main Course

If you could learn another language, which one would you pick, and why? I would choose Gaelic even though I understand it's not spoken much in Ireland. I'd like to learn it because it's related to my heritage

Dessert

Finish this sentence: In 5 years I expect to be… in a cozy little cottage on the Delaware shore!

The Castle Personality Test

You are a bit tentative when it comes to new experiences. You have to push yourself to try new things, but once you do, you love the adventure. You like to think that people see you as dramatic and fascinating. You do your best to seem mysterious. You are a very realistic person. You see the world as it is, flaws and all. Right now, you feel like the whole world is open to you. You see lots of possibilities. Overall, your life is dramatic and unpredictable. You life in interesting times. You aren't optimistic about the future. You worry about what will happen to the world and if we'll be able to clean up the messes we've made.

The Castle Personality Test

Sunday Sundries: Halloween and other things

It was a busy weekend so this will be a busy post!

On Friday, Halloween, Little T's class had a fall celebration party and Kennan, TB and I were among the many relatives that showed up to take part in the revelry. First the kids went out to pick pumpkins.



The kids and their guests then rotated around several activities set up in the classroom. One of them was pumpkin decorating.



Another was a spooky dart board!





There was spooky music playing in the background and Little T wanted to dance so I did our version of "The Monster Mash"!





One activity involved finger painting a bat. Little T didn't want anything to do with the finger paints so he colored one instead. Although he does tolerate stuff on his hands better than he did before there are times when he just doesn't want to and that's okay!


Another activity involved using tongs or tweezers to pick up small spooky toys and get them into the pumpkin.





Then came the kids' favorite part of the party--food! Everyone said it was the quietest the kids' had been all day!



TB was busy taking pictures all during the party. Now he encouraged Little T to smile.


Tomas reacted as if to say enough already, Pop-Pop!



This picture of Little T with his teacher came out beautifully! We all had a wonderful time!




Afterwards, I wanted to take pictures of some of the fall colors in the area. The first is of a tree/bush in our yard; the other two were taken at nearby Brendan Byrne State Park. This is the time of the year I love best, when the leaves have changed their colors.





Yesterday Kennan needed to work and so TB and I spent the day with Little T. We took him for his speech therapy session and I'm so impressed and gratified by what the therapists are able to accomplish with him. He won't practice his speech skills with us yet but I heard him clearly say all his vowels, some consonant sounds, "erase" and the sentence "I see apple". Way to go, T! By the end of the day, TB and I were ready to drop--he's a very active little boy!










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This is from last week but I thought it would be fun!

1. When did you start blogging? I started blogging online in 2002.
2. How often do you blog? How many times per week, per day? I try to blog at least once a day but lately I've been erratic
3. How many blogs do you have? I have three but haven't kept up with the other two
4. How many blogs do you visit daily? What type of blogs do you tend to visit? Do you always leave comments? I used to visit lots of blogs and leave comments; I've been following two blogs faithfully but usually don't leave any comments. This is all part of this "thing" I'm going through
5. What is it about blogging that you enjoy the most? What is it that you don't like about blogging? I enjoy expressing myself the most and I least enjoy the pressure I feel to keep blogging even when I don't feel like it
6. What do you usually blog about? Lately it's been fluffy meme stuff

Snackie Sunday

IS IT POSSIBLE FOR WOMEN AND SINGLE STRAIGHT MEN BE PLATONIC FRIENDS? Not if the women are also straight and single--that's what I've found to be true when I tried to be "just friends" with a guy. When it was he that wanted to be the friend, I tried but inevitably developed crushes on them and then was hurt and angry when they didn't reciprocate. :P

Sunday Stealing

The McDanger Theme

What are your nicknames?
Cassie or Cass
What TV gameshow or reality show would you like to be on? Jeopardy

What was the first movie you bought in VHS or DVD? Are you kidding? That was like 20 years ago! I have no idea

What is your favorite scent? Musk

If you had one million dollars to spend only on yourself, what would you spend it on? First I'd pay off my bills and then I'd buy a cottage in Delaware for my husband and me. I know the money is supposed to be only for myself but my husband comes as a package. Then I'd get us vacations around the world, to Hawaii, the Bahamas, Germany, Ireland. I'd get the Claddagh birthstone I've been wanting. I'd get plastic surgery to get rid of extra hanging skin once I've lost enormous weight. I'd make sure my family is cared for and give to charity because that would be part of taking care of myself too.

What is one place you've visited, can't forget and want to go back to? Mystic, CT

Do you trust easily? No

Do you generally think before you act, or act before you think? I'm very impulsive so I speak or act first before I think

Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days? Oh yes

Do you have a good body image? Nope

What is your favorite fruit? Apples

What websites do you visit daily? blogs that I read, the news, weather, stuff like that

What have you been seriously addicted to lately? Sleep

What's the last song that got stuck in your head? "Down the Street" from That 70s Show

What is your favorite thing to wear? Jeans and a tee shirt

Do you think Rice Krispies are yummy? They're okay

What would you do if you saw $100 lying on the ground? pick it up of course

What items couldn't you go without during the day? a book, my computer, my glucose meter, insulin

What should you be doing right now? cleaning the house

Unconscious Mutterings

1. In love :: romance


2. Be my guest :: go ahead


3. Number one :: first


4. Swallowed whole :: goldfish


5. 50 percent :: half


6. Made in :: Japan


7. Supplement :: addition


8. Right for :: me


9. Endless :: forever


10. Ceramic :: sculpture

HowManyOfMe.com

There are 4 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

Wordless Wednesday: Reflected Desire

Our Visit to the Mall

Today we spent the morning with our Little T. One of the things we did was go to the mall. We'd taken him to the mall about 3 weeks ago and enjoyed it very much. It was fun for all of us and somewhat like a field trip. How so?

Well, take the escalators f'r instance. We taught him how to ride safely up and down. T enjoyed it thoroughly and as the grandparents, we have the time and patience to go up and down, up and down, up and down over and over. It's cheaper than going to Great Adventure and T loved it.

Walking around the mall provides lots of opportunities for learning that you never would have thought of. We could talk about people's jobs, the plants, the stuff up for sale--just all kinds of information. T did a lot more talking in the car going and coming than he did at the mall; still, he absorbs information like a sponge and he sure enjoyed himself.

You can't beat the price of an outing like this: free. That's particularly important for TB and me these days.

Best of all: we got to spend some good quality time with T!

The pictures in the slide show combine our two trips.

Some Little T Firsts

We spent some fun quality time with our Little T at the local zoo. It's not very big and it's one you could easily walk through in about an hour without stopping to look at anything. This is the perfect kind of place for a grandparent to take a grandchild. There are lots of picnic tables, benches on which to sit, and play animals on which to climb. You can take a very leisurely walk around and feed or pet some of the animals, watch them play, stand in awe of them and so on.

It was beautiful yesterday and we figured it was the ideal place to visit. The first new thing was that Little T willingly put on a cap! This is nothing short of a miracle as it takes a great deal of effort to get him to try new things. If you are reading for the first time, I should say that our grandson is on the autistic spectrum and so things go very differently with him. He experiences language and sensations in ways that we don't understand because he's not able to tell us.

When the seasons change, it can be an issue: putting on a new autumn coat, wearing mittens or a hat, putting on boots, etc. Last winter, he finally began to wear a ski cap but has always adamantly refused to wear any other cap...until our trip. Could it be that this hat is particularly comfortable or that he likes it because it's white or is it that it says his name on the bill? We're not sure.

Is he too cool or what?



Little T stopped by the tapir pen and called our attention to it. He's begun to communicate with us this way more and more to our absolute joy and delight. Sometimes he'll use a sign, like 'bridge', and sometimes he'll point and try to make a sound.

The next time he's here, I'll have a clip of a tapir making a sound thanks to a commenter from the official world tapir day, which we just missed. What's the big deal with tapirs? They appear a lot in Little T's Go Diego Go video game. He has a microphone and is supposed to imitate the sound of a tapir. He'll hold the mike up to his lips and open his mouth but so far no sound has come out. Now he's got something to imitate.



Many times in the past, Little T has just ignored animals but now he's beginning to interact with them more and more. He runs with Buddy, pets our cats, and now he wanted to feed the monkeys! He even dared to stroke a pony at the zoo although I could tell he was really nervous about it. He did enjoy feeding the animals, giggling and smiling when they'd take the food and put it in their mouths.



Another thing Little T did was imitate the behavior of the animals. I wasn't sure what he was doing at first when I began taking these pictures but once I realized, I was very happy! It's telling me that T is in tune with what's going on around him more frequently!




And best of all ... as I was walking toward him from the ladies' room, Lttle T smiled and began to run to me and called out, "Nana, Nana!" I nearly fell down in a faint, it was so distinct! I swept him up and hugged him and nearly broke down and cried. We had such a wonderful morning!

Playing with Our Grandson

Wordless Wednesday: Autism Awareness Month

Wordless Wednesday
Why did I choose this photo? I wrote an explanation in comments...

Little T on Thurday: Need A New Bike II

Our Little T has grown so much in the last few months! TB and I didn't realize just how much until we went outside to play a few days ago. He got onto his little trike and we realized: hey, look how long his legs have gotten! The boy needs a new bicylcle, one with training wheels!

If this is the first time you're reading my blog, just wanted to say that Little T isn't ignoring us. He has pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS), which is on the autistic spectrum.

How can you tell if a child has PDD-NOS?

You can't. Only a professional can make the diagnosis but some red flags to look for:

The child has a serious language delay and doesn't speak, just makes noises, grunts and squeals

There's little or no eye contact or it's "off" somehow

The child plays by him or herself and ignores other kids or stands by and watches; doesn't seem interested in socializing and it's not from shyness

The child doesn't respond to verbal cues, like smiling back or saying "hello"

Most kids, if they can't hear or speak, will try to communicate their needs somehow--like by pointing to their mouths or to the fridge. A child with PDD-NOS doesn't usually try to communicate.

The child has repetitive play instead of imaginative and gets upset if you interrupt it or try something different. With Tomas, it's playing "automatic doors". He'll take any toy and turn them into sliding doors like the ones you see at a supermarket

Here is a pretty good and understandable list of the symptoms or signs of PDD-NOS.

April is Autism Awareness Month: Mr. Farmer's Almanac

April's been designated autism awareness month and since our Little T has PDD-NOS, I thought it would be a good idea to focus some of my posts about the condition.

Some people who are autistic have amazing abilities. Although he is basically non-verbal, if you take Little T someplace even just one time he can point his way there and back again afterwards. Some, but not all, people with autism are called autistic savants:

There are many forms of savant abilities. The most common forms involve mathematical calculations, memory feats, artistic abilities, and musical abilities. A mathematical ability which many autistic individuals display is calendar memory. They could be asked a question like: 'What day of the week was May 22, 1961? and they can determine the answer within seconds--Monday. Others can multiply and divide large numbers in their head and can also calculate square roots and prime numbers without much hesitation.

Examples of some memory feats include: remembering everything about presidents (birth/death, term in office, names and birth dates of family members, cabinet members, etc.), memorizing the U.S. highway system, and remembering everyone's birth date, even after meeting the person once and not seeing him/her for 20 years.

I don't mean to say that Little T is a savant--it's just really cool that he has such a special talent.

A local news station in my area--CBS3--featured a man with very special abilities yesterday. His name is Francis Jennings and his nickname is "The Human Farmer's Almanac".

Friends and co-workers at Keystone Aerial Surveys said Francis is on top of the forecast regardless of the date.

"His grasp of the history of weather is astonishing," said Mary Potter of Keystone Aerial Surveys.

When asked what the weather was like on January 31, 1979, Jennings said, "What we had was, we had started off sunny, became cloudy and snowed during the afternoon and we had about 2.3 inches."

What about August 25, 1972?

"Ok, I believe that day we had mostly sunny and it was very hot. If I recall it was 96 that day."

With a check of the records, CBS 3 meteorologist Maria LaRosa confirmed there was indeed snow on January 31, 1979 and there was a high of 95 degrees on August 25, 1972.

Cool, huh?

It blows away the stereotypical image of an autistic person with the hand flapping and rocking. Yes, some folks do that but not all. That's the important thing to remember. People who are autistic are all individuals, too!

April is Autism Awareness Month

Our Little T was the handsomest new born baby I'd ever seen. In fact, I shocked my own children by exclaiming he was so beautiful. Of course, my kids were beautiful in my eyes but there's no doubt that they were also red and wrinkled. That wasn't the cause with Tomas. To just look at him now, he appears to be a very handsome--and normal--little boy.

He is not normal in our definition of that word. He's been diagnosed with pervasive developmental disorder, not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS). Just what are some of the signs of autism?

Autism varies widely in its severity and symptoms and may go unrecognized, especially in mildly affected children or when it is masked by more debilitating handicaps. Doctors rely on a core group of behaviors to alert them to the possibility of a diagnosis of autism. These behaviors are:

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impaired ability to make friends with peers
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impaired ability to initiate or sustain a conversation with others
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absence or impairment of imaginative and social play
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stereotyped, repetitive, or unusual use of language
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restricted patterns of interest that are abnormal in intensity or focus
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preoccupation with certain objects or subjects
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inflexible adherence to specific routines or rituals

That's from the National Institute of Health's fact sheet about autism. There is more information about the signs of autism looking at development at different ages from Autism Speaks.

You can see from these pictures that there are times when Little T is not engaged with the rest of the world. We all do that to some extent but with Tomas those periods of time last longer. He also has trouble communication with speech. On the positive side, he does engage and make eye contact and is very pleased when we understand what he signs (or the few words he says).




Tomas is in a special education preschool program that addresses his needs. He receives speech therapy and occupational therapy twice a week. What a difference that has made and how far he's come since he was first diagnosed!

Little T Thursday: Doors

It was very clear when Little T moved back in with us 2 years ago that he was obsessed with doors. It began with the sliding doors of grocery stores and the library and places like Best Buy. He seemed to have a need to watch them open and close repeatedly. His play was totally about sliding two things back and forth as if they were automatic doors. They could be blocks, Lincoln logs, crayons or even two pieces of paper. Gradually we were able to get him involved in more imaginative play but he's always gone back to the door game at least once day.

The fascination with doors evolved to our accordion closet doors as you can see in the video. He loves to play hide and seek but becomes distracted when the doors don't shut perfectly. Then he pitched some things out of my closet before the doors closed well enough to satisfy him.

Other doors presented a more difficult problem. We began working on eliminating the door behavior because it's really interfering with other people as well now. Example: when we'd approach the school, the door had to be shut. If someone else opened the door to go in or come out, he'd stop cold. If the person should try to hold the door open for us in a mannerly way, Little T would become very upset and excited. At first we'd say, "Sorry, he wants to open the door himself". What became a pain is that he'd plant himself in front of others trying to get by and scream if you tried to move him out of the way.

On Monday, as we approached the doors one of the teacher's aides opened it and stood outside holding it so all the parents and kids could get in. She wasn't about to close it and wait while one little kid opened it again. When T realized he wasn't going to get his way, he threw himself on the ground and had a full blown 2 year old type tantrum. That afternoon, everyone began working together on a plan to eliminate that behavior.

T doesn't get to open doors anymore. He totally hates it. He holds someone's hand and the other has to remain "quiet" (down) while an adult opens the door. He goes through the door and if he does it without having a fit, he's praised and rewarded. Now that it's Thursday, he's becoming ornery. He's probably wondering how long he's going to be deprived of opening doors and so he's becoming more defiant and refusing to go through the door without having a big fit first.

The teacher assures us that he'll eventually understand he won't get his way and that will stop. This is where tough love begins, right?

13 Books I'd Like To Read Next (TT#9)

I'm posting my TT this evening because tomorrow is going to be another crazy day. By this time tomorrow night, I hope to get around and visit other TT'ers. First up in the morning is going with TB to the hospital for his colonoscopy. I need to drive him home because he'll have been sedated--although if he had his way, he'd be awake and taking pictures! After that are more doctor appointments. Yeesh.

This is an easy TT because I have about 240 books on my to-be-read shelves to choose from. Anyway, here goes.

Thirteen Books I Want To Read From My TBR Shelves 1. Moloka'i by Alan Brennert. Ever since I read Hawaii years ago, I've been fascinated and appalled by the idea that the lepers were treated so brutally. I wanted to learn more about what happened. 2. Ninety Minutes In Heaven by Don Piper is about a man who was killed in an accident--at least for 90 minutes, anyway. I've also always been intrigued with the hereafter thanks to John Edward. I thought Embraced By The Light was fascinating and am interested to learn of this man's experiences. 3. Saving Fish From Drowining by Amy Tan. I've had the book sitting there for a long time and she is one of my favorite authors. 4. Daniel Isn't Talking by Marti Leimbech is about a little boy with autism and I'm interested in reading it soon because, obviously, of Little T 5. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini is another book that I've had for a long time. I enjoy learning about different cultures and countries and what better way for me to learn than by reading? 6. Don't Eat This Book by Morgan Spurlock, the man who made the film Supersize Me!. The book's about the "supersizing of America" a.k.a. fast food! 7. Sudden Sea: The Great Hurricane of 1938 by R.A. Scotti. This is the unnamed hurricane that reshaped Long Island if I remember my history right and I wanted to learn more about it 8. Irish History For Dummies by Mike Cronin. I want to learn more about where my ancestors came from! 9. Unlocking the Meaning of Lost by Lynnette Porter--yes, the show is indeed an obsession for me! 10. Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston. I want to read some classics as well as non fiction. When I took American Lit in college, I remember enjoying Hurston's short stories. I never read this book, it's about time. 11. Kim by Rudyard Kipling. I thought it was about time I read this book too. I remember seeing and enjoying the movie. 12. The Jungle by Upton Sinclair. Well...I guess if I'm going to read about fast food I might as well also read the book that led to the creation of the FDA way back when. 13. No Country For Old Men by Cormac McCarthy. Hey, the movie version won the Academy Award and usually the book is better, right? Happy TT everyone!

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What's New, aka Why I Love Cat Blogging (TT#8)

Thirteen Things about What's New With Us 1. TB had his second epidural yesterday and while it went off without complications, he feels worse today than he did before the shot. We've heard this is normal and that he might feel this increased misery for two days. The doctor injected 1/3 more steroid than he did before hoping to make the shot work. The downside is that TB has to watch his sugar level as steroids wreak havoc on them. 2. The doctor also had TB schedule an EMG (this is a nerve test) so that he could identify the exact nerve being pinched. An EMG can be very uncomfortable and painful. I had one for my hand. Not fun. 3. Linda was supposed to get a new used car from a Ford dealership, signed the paperwork and overnight they changed their minds, refunded her money and said we can't help you. I don't know what happened there but then she went to another place, a buy here pay here, and picked out what seemed to be a nice Mercury Sable. When she drove it home, though, it rocked in park. It went to keep going. The following day, the engine light came on and the car continued to try and drive in park. She's having the car looked at now and trying to get her money back...good luck! :P 4. My doctor has been adjusting my meds and so my moods have been up and down like a see saw. Cymbalta does a better job treating my arthritis and fibromyalgia pain than I gave it credit for because I could barely move for a couple of days. I'm taking my usual amount of Cymbalta again as a result. 5. It seems our Little T has developmental speech apraxia and right now the goal is to teach him sign language. That may be his primary mode of communication although getting him additional speech therapy would help. We're looking into that 6. Bill collectors are beginning to call us now instead of our infamously financially delayed family member who shall go nameless in this post :P. We tell them TB has been on disability since September and that the state has been careless about getting checks to us in a timely manner. Meanwhile, the amount is 1/3 of what he used to make. 7. My mom is still having major problems with her computer and unfortunately, I can't diagnosis the trouble over the phone...but we have so much going on here, we can't get down there either 8. My brother applied for a better job that we're praying he gets although it'll probably mean a major move for him 9. Kristin got a job at Six Flags Great Adventure *is this necessarily a good thing? I'm not sure...) and is busy trying to save up money so she can go to a dude ranch with her friend's family in May 10. Heidi still seems to have no insurance :( 11. Tomas spontaneously asked for milk the other day. Normally I'd ask him, "Are you thirsty?" or "are you hungry?" and he'd shake his head 'no' or say "yeh!" But this time, he turned to me and signed "milk" and then headed to the refrigerator. Communication breakthrough! YAY! And he always looks so happy when he makes himself understood. So this is a very good piece of news 12. Last Thursday, TB and I were sitting down to watch Lost and Sox jumped up on the couch with us. TB was snacking on jalapeno Doritos which are very spicy and Sox took a chip out of his hand and crunched it down! If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes I wouldn't have believed it! We knew he should not eat such spicy stuff so TB quickly shut his bag. That did not stop Sox. I had sour cream and onion chips and was still sitting with one in my hand, frozen with disbelief and laughter, and the little kitty took it right out of my fingers and chomped it down too! There are NO chips for anyone tonight! I wish I'd had my camera out! 13. Cubby has been making more and more appearances, staying out longer and coming over to say hello. I've actually gotten a chance to pet him several times for a few moments each before he'd dart back under the bed or into the closet. He's really coming around! Now, if you read the first 10 on my last and then the last 3 you'll understand why I love cat blogging (and grandson blogging) best. Cat blogging is fun and takes my mind off our troubles. Happy TT!

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