Tuesday, August 31

Tuesday Thoughts

“Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.” — Jane Howard

This is a timely quote for me. I’m at a peculiar stage in my life. All my kids are pretty much grown and are young adults. All still live at home with us partly for convenience (they’re still in school) and partly out of financial necessity. Young adults, though, don’t want to be children. No matter what and no matter how old they are, as long as they live at home they’re pretty much viewed as tall children. That can cause a lot of conflict.

When I was younger, my father would tell me that mother birds would have to push their young out of the nest so they could fly away. That always sounded so cold and cruel and I didn’t understand the concept. Now I do! My peculiar stage comes from realizing my baby birds need to fly away soon and build their own nests.
At the same time, though, I would be lost without my kids. Even when they are away one their own, I know I’ll always need them and to have them in my life. Thank heavens for cell phones and computers if distance is an issue!

Needing family goes beyond immediate relatives like parents, children and spouse. I have a brother that I don’t see or talk to very often but I need him in my life, not only for the person he is but for the connection I have with him throughout my life. My mother is a dysfunctional person and I’ve felt that lack of connection throughout my life. It continues to be a problem for me.

Families give you a sense of identity and a way to belong. You get part of who you are from your family, good or bad. That’s why you need them!

My favorite sport is ... bowling. I started bowling when I was in elementary school. There was a summer league in Baltimore that provided transportation to the bowling alley. My parents signed my brother and me up for it to give us something to do and we ended up loving it! The first league was a duckpin league. Duckpins are different than ten pins in that the pins are half the size and the balls fit in the palm of your hand. It might seem easier to do duckpins but it’s actually harder to control the ball.

When I got into junior high school, my brother and I switched to a ten pin league. For a couple of years, we bowled on a team with a neighbor friend. I participated in tournaments and that was a lot of fun.

As a young adult, I bowled on leagues for several years and usually served as the secretary. I enjoyed the responsibility of typing up team and individual stats and averages.

I stopped bowling because of the arthritis and injuries in my hands. The ball became too heavy to hold—even a 10 lb. ball. There’s no duck pin lanes around here. Oh well.

If I could be any age, what would it be -- list 10 reasons why

If I could know what I know now I would be 30 again because:

1. I would have a better chance at being employable after getting my degree
2. I would be in better physical shape
3. If I had the wisdom I had now, I definitely would be focusing more on my writing talents
4. I wouldn’t suffer from middle age brain like I do now
5. I would have more stamina
6. I would address the overuse symptoms in my hands right away
7. I would be able to do more things because of better stamina and better physical condition
8. I think it would be easier to deal with the loose skin from weight loss if I was younger
9. I could bowl again!
10. My reflexes would be quicker

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