Roller coaster ride

If there is any one small consolation it's that TB and I are not alone on this roller coaster ride of financial disaster. We go up, we go down. We were up on Monday and Tuesday after meeting with JCHD, Jersey Counseling & Housing Development. The lady there looked at our ridiculous budget and still worked with us, talking to the mortgage company. We got a disability forbearance until the end of September, time for us to regroup and redo our finances. We have to show that we can afford our mortgage and our bills and still have money left over. A daunting task but we figured we could do it.


Now we are rocketing back down, after talking with someone at Consumer Credit. We'd hoped to enroll in their program but as soon as our expenses put us in the red, she told us we wouldn't qualify for the program. The alternatives would be selling the house or filing for bankruptcy, although the latter might not help us that much.

We need for TB's social security disability to be approved. Then he'll be able to collect his disability pension and then we can start approaching Consumer Credit Counseling again. We have to show that we can meet all our basic expenses first and then have money left over for bills.

This whole process is so scary. I felt hopeful up until I hung up with this woman from the CCC. Now I am feeling despair again. What if SSA doesn't come through by the end of September? I had to take an Ativan to calm myself down.

On top of it all, TB is suffering terribly. He couldn't sleep at all last night between the pain in his back and in his legs. We had to get our partial deposit back from the bariatric surgeon to help us meet expenses during this forbearance period. He really needs that surgery desperately by the practice will not accept just the insurance company's payment of $7000. They want their whole fee of $8000 odd dollars and it doesn't matter the circumstances. Thanks a lot, NJ Bariatrics. :P

TB is confused about what to do next and so am I. We can wait for the disability to kick in and then we could put the deposit down again so he can get the surgery. We could try a different doctor and start over again. The rollercoaster plunges down even further. When will it go up again?