Usually I've got one cat on my desk and one waiting on the arm chair to leap on as soon as the first one vacates....like right now. Mouse is on my desk and Amber is waiting, somewhat impatiently.
One day last week, though, I had both Mouse and Cubby. Usually when this happens one cat or the other will back down and jump off but not this time! I had a twofer on my desk! Two cats to pet in the space meant for one. Other than giving each other the evil fishy eye from time to time, they shared very nicely.
Yesterday I talked to my therapist about what happened yesterday morning and, really, what's been happening in recent days and weeks. Everything overwhelms me, from trying to answer all my email to straightening up my room to going to this training. The therapist helped put things into perspective for me: I've been through a lot.
We also agreed that it was time to start working on my specific issues--like anxiety--instead of week to week crisis management.
Before my first husband died, I wasn't exactly a social butterfly but I was definitely more outgoing. I tend to hide in my house and have been for the last couple of years. I used to write, fan fiction it was but still they were long stories with plots. I could do it again if I wasn't afraid. I used to work and was a good interpreter.
I don't like being a hermit and so fearful of everything. I worry about what people think of me when they see me. I worry my stuff is no good and I'm just wasting my time. I worry about panic attacks in public. I wonder what happened to my philosophy of let go and let God.
Anyway, the therapist suggested that this month I should try to heal. As for coping with the anxieties, she suggested making a list of a few things that I want to accomplish during the day--not a lot of things, just a couple.
One thing I wanted to accomplish was a Cats on Tuesday post. Another thing I want to accomplish is visiting people back. Another is to make an appointment for myself to see the eye doctor. Another is to straighten up a part of my room so it won't be so overwhelming. Baby steps.
Want more Cats on Tuesday? Be sure to check out Gattina's blog. Today is also Tuxie Tuesday and then there's Blogging Cat Noos for all the latest!
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9 comments:
It seems like it would be great to have both cats on the desk, but I think then you can't get anything done - except for giving them some attention :)
Hope things start to get better for you soon.
Well, you have my prayers and support for getting back to your center and finding your way out of Overwhelm. Looks like your cats are trying to assist you 2! :-)
Oh that´s a nice twofer on your desk!!! It is good that they can share.
A blog is a good occasion to tell about your thoughts. I wish you all the best!
Life has twists and turns. I hope
things will work out better for you
soon. I've found going forward and
not looking back helps, and try to
do things you enjoy to take some stress away. With anxiety 'thinking'
tooooo much makes everything harder.
I am glad you have twofer feline
friends to keep you company, nothing
like a cats purr to make a bad day
seem brighter! Jewelgirl
It really is about taking baby steps. Just knowing what you'd like to do is a start, and with the post you're on your way! Good luck to you. We all have fears to face.
Cats wanting to be on the same place I know too, lol !
You must be in a terrible state, it looks like a deep depression to me, all symptomes are there. I had it many years ago and it is something I wouldn't wish for my worst enemy. Doing a list is very nice. I remember I had to carry around a little paper with the word STOP and each time I was worried or anxious I had to take it out. It sounds silly, but really it helped. It's very good that you have a therapeut, she certainly can help you getting out of this deep black tunnel ! I am happy that you participated in COT, writing is also a good therapy !!
And don't worry what people are thinking about you, they are not worse it !
For me cats is the best healing there is. Study what they do, even when they do nothing. We have lot's to learn.
have a nice rest of the week.
Love your cats, such pretty creatures.
I feel for you, having to worry so much about things. I am the exact opposite, I hardly ever worry, and wonder why I don't worry as much as my Mom does. But I trust in people and life, and I don't care if people think I'm weird, shy or unsocial.
I hope you get through your life more easily from now on, little tiny steps are great. I would suggest for now, see the eye doctor!
My eyes suddenly began to blur close-up things. I'm an artist, so I need my vision. I was scared, thought I might be going blind. Saw the doctor, and all I needed were glasses! All is good now, I can see my work. I hope it's as simple as that for you as well.
Good luck, and I'll be back to visit.
We will be purring for your emotional healing.
~Socks, Scylla & Charybdis
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