Thursday Thirteen #30 & Other Sundries

Thirteen Ways to Deal With Sociopaths I read the a book called The Sociopath Next Door by Dr. Martha Stout not so much to learn how to tell a sociopath from a regular person but how to deal with them. They are all around us and some may be family members. In my case, I'm certain some are family members. I don't want to copy Dr. Stout's words, just paraphrase. This is actually an excellent book and I'd recommend it to anyone. It's very informative. So how do you deal with a sociopath? 1. The first thing you have to do is accept the fact that some people are born without a conscience and there's nothing you can do about it. Sounds like admitting to being powerless in a twelve step group, doesn't it? 2. Go with your gut feeling if you are getting bad vibes from a person, even if that person is in a position of authority or power. Even teachers and therapists can be sociopaths and if they are, they can destroy your self-esteem if you let them. 3. Follow the "Rule of Three" with a person you are in a relationship with of any kind--friend, lover, spouse, etc. That is, allow only one lie, broken promise or neglected responsibility. Dr. Stout says one might be a misunderstanding. Three is a pattern of behavior. 4. Don't be blind to authority figures...look what happened when no one stopped Hitler. The author cites a very frightening experiment conducted with two subjects. One was to be the teacher, the other the student. The student was put in the other room and attached to electrodes. The teacher was supposed to give a shock whenever the student gave a wrong answer. An authority figure in a white coat stood over the teacher. With each wrong answer, the student began to scream and beg to be released. The authority figure coldly told the teacher to go on, deliver the shock at higher and higher doses--and six in ten teachers blindly obeyed! 5. Don't be taken in by blarney--flattery. 6. Don't let your self respect be swayed by fear. 7. Don't try to play mind games with a sociopath 8. If you can, avoid the sociopath entirely 9. Don't be taken in by the sociopath's bids for pity 10. Don't try to "fix" a sociopath, it can't be done. 11. Don't protect a sociopath, even a family member 12. Protect your self esteem and this one I will quote: 13. Living well is the best revenge. Get the Thursday Thirteen code here! The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Thursday Challenge

The theme for this week's challenge is autumn.
This is the view from my back yard. My neighbor's got the loveliest tree! Our trees haven't begun to change yet and are still pretty green!





Thursday Thunks

What was your favorite toy as a child? My grandmother made me a stuffed cat I called "Meow". I took her everywhere with me and slept with her. She was my Velveteen Rabbit.

If money was no object, but you could only buy ONE thing, what would you buy your spouse/significant other?

I would buy him a sailboat and then we could sail around on our lake

What about your children? New cars


Now, if you only had $10 to buy one thing, what would it be? Stuffed animals

What's on your refrigerator? Magnets--pictures of the kids, artwork by Kristin, doodles by Marianne

What's on top of it? All kinds of stuff: lunch bags, baskets, and other junk
Go look in it. Whats in there that would gross the rest of us out? Leftover vegetables

Whats your favorite type of potato? Baked

Do you have an address book? Do you write in it or do you just stick return addresses/envelopes in it? I write in it

Look up. Do you like your ceiling? It's okay considering it's just a ceiling

Booking Through Thursday

Okay–here was an interesting article by Christopher Schoppa in the Washington Post.

Avid readers know all too well how easy it is to acquire books — it’s the letting go that’s the difficult part. … During the past 20 years, in which books have played a significant role in both my personal and professional lives, I’ve certainly had my fair share of them (and some might say several others’ shares) in my library. Many were read and saved for posterity, others eventually, but still reluctantly, sent back out into the world.

But there is also a category of titles that I’ve clung to for years, as they survived numerous purges, frequent library donations and countless changes of residence. I’ve yet to read them, but am absolutely certain I will. And should. When, I’m not sure, as I’m constantly distracted by the recent, just published and soon to be published works.

So, the question is his: “What tomes are waiting patiently on your shelves?“

I have over 200 books waiting to be read and I just keep collecting more. I think that puts me in the category of nutty cat lady bookaholic. Anyway, I have a lot of unread classics like Moby Dick and Anastasia that I am convinced I'll get to eventually 8^) as well as hundreds of contemporary books I want to read but just haven't gotten to yet. I'm slowly working my way through it!

What Your Nose Says About You

You are straightforward and honest. You sometimes offend people without realizing it. You are optimistic and trusting. You expect the best from people.

What Does Your Nose Say About You?